Whenever we encounter hurt we feel like we have no choice but to react negatively. This, however, is a very jaded and twisted perspective as we all have the power of choice. We can choose to be better and not become bitter over a hurtful experience. I am not saying that it will be the easiest thing to do, but with a little effort, one can achieve what seems impossible at the sight of raw pain.
Bitterness occurs when we allow hurt to fester within our hearts. We meditate and regurgitate every detail of what caused pain. This causes our heart to become sick and eventually our bodies as poison (hurt, anger, malice, envy, hatred, revenge, etc. ) is being pumped through our veins. So how does one know if they have become bitter? Well, I am glad you asked. Below are a few indicators of a bitter person.
- Holding a Grudge: Forgiveness is not a priority for a person who is bitter. Bitter persons like to hold grudges and nurse the wounds that have been incurred. So if you find yourself nurturing hurtful experience, then chances are you are bitter. If you find yourself constantly talking about what has impacted you, then you are bitter.
- Always Negative: Bitter persons are unable to see anything in a positive light. The glass is always empty for them. There is always things to complain about even when there is nothing to complain about. If you find yourself complaining always complaining chances are you are high on the bitter radar.
- Skewed Perspective: Bitter persons think that someone is always looking to hurt them. They are very suspicious of everything and have the attitude “me against the world.” If you think you have to defend yourself against the whole world, then you are bitter.
- Attention Seekers: Bitter persons love attention as such they will act out to get the attention they are seeking. No matter how minor an incident may be, they will make a mountain out of a molehill.
- Being Jealous: Bitter persons are usually jealous of others and childish. They seem to think that others have what they want. They feel like they are more deserving of what another person has. If you find yourself constantly comparing yourself to others, then you are a bitter person.
So now that you are aware of some of the traits of a bitter person how can you overcome bitterness? Well, the answer is simple. After doing a soul search and acknowledging your location on the bitter radar, forgive. FORGIVE, FORGIVE, FORGIVE and then forgive some more. Forgive and let things go. Forgive when it hurts until it hurts and let it go. In doing this, you would have freed the individual(s) that has caused harm and also free yourself. You will become a better person for having done this. Remember the Bantu proverb which says ” a bitter heart eats its owner.” Forgive! Let it go and release you from the prison of bitterness.
5/8/2017 Dr. R.A.